If I Ran the Zoo by Dr. Seuss

By Dr. Seuss

Younger Gerald McGrew thinks of every kind of bizarre animals he'd have in a zoo. Dr. Seuss at his best.--Horn Book.  

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By Dr. Seuss

Younger Gerald McGrew thinks of every kind of bizarre animals he'd have in a zoo. Dr. Seuss at his best.--Horn Book.  

Show description

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Sample text

Once he came home from school and asked his father for a measly dollar so that he could go to the movies on Saturday morning. Noah, as usual, had to put in his two cents. “You can’t give the child a dollar just like that,” he said. ” (But Noah wasn’t all bad. He often allowed Jacob Two-Two to tag along with him on his newspaper route. ) “Your brother has a point, Jacob. You will have to win the money by proving your intelligence. ” “Yes,” Jacob Two-Two said. ” “Good. Now you will have to concentrate, because I can allow you only five seconds on the first impossibly difficult question.

Sure, Dippy. ” he protested. “I’m a vegetarian. Well, for the most part. I do find garlic sausage yummy. But I’m a law-abiding citizen. ” “Okay, okay. ” “I never said that. But people – bah! You’ve only been around for three million years or so and you’ve already made a garbage dump out of the earth. When we were lords of the planet there were no factories belching stinky fumes into the air or spilling nasty chemicals into the rivers and oceans. ” “Yeah, sure. But there were also no airplanes or hospitals or TV or books or baseball or glee clubs.

Yes, said the yes men, rubbing their stomachs, and yes, said the yes women, rubbing their stomachs, too. “Wait,” Wacko said. “Let me think. Kid like Jacob Two-Two in pizza parlor. Green moving boulder with red eyes. Flying trees. Wind that stinks of garlic sausage. There has to be a connection there somewhere. Let me feed the information into my computer …” Which was when the singing in the distance started. “Daisy (burp, burp), Daisy (belch, belch), Give me your answer, do (burp, belch) …” Next thing they knew, the Dragon-Slayer’s camp was being bombarded by flying trees.

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